John Putnam's Journal
May 27, 2003 (Part 1)
Day 2 - Tuesday, May 27th, 2003 - We had found out the previous day that the boat Laura was on was impounded by Texas Parks and Wildlife Game Wardens in Kingsland which was on the north end of the Lake. So, Tuesday morning Phil and I and our wives met in the lobby of our hotel and decided to load up, grab something to eat and head over to the lake house. Once at the lake house, we did the normal greetings. The "How are you doing?" and such. I was curious if dad slept or not. From what I recall, he did. Mom and dad carry around pill boxes with vitamins and prescriptions. I am sure there was something to help them sleep. I did my usual, I slipped out to the sun deck for a look through the binoculars. Justin was out back with his brother-in-law. They had a table full of flowers and were making a wreath. I barely said hello. We got directions from the older Jerry on how to get to the impound. It looked like it was about an hour away. We were supposed to meet the wardens at 1 pm. The media was meeting the wardens at 1:30pm and at this point, mom did not want to see the media. Not wanting to chance being late, our family all left for Kingsland and the impound. We arrived very early. We stopped and got some gas and some soft drinks and went over to the impound and waited. Right at 1 pm everyone started to arrive at the impound. The group included several (maybe 5 or 6) game wardens, Justin's family and Pepper's family. Everyone piled out of their vehicles and we stood around and watched the wardens unlock the storage unit the boat was in. They hooked it up to one of their trucks and pulled it out into the open. There it was. I had my camera and immediately started taking pictures. Pepper jumped up in the boat and started going through stuff. The wardens had advised the boys were able to collect their personal belongings. Clothes, tools, ice chest etc. I was taking pictures and moving all around the boat. I glanced in it. I thought the boat that hit her came directly across the boat she was in without any angle. That was wrong. The initial impact from the boat that hit her was directly into the driver's seat. The driver's seat was approximately mid-vessel and all the way to the starboard side of the boat. Right where she was sitting. However, the path of the boat was at an angle such that the exit was over the bow just to the port side. It was an open bow vessel, used mainly for cruising. After I realized what the path of the other boat was, the scene drastically changed for me. Now I could really see the path through her boat. Low and behold, the chair she was sitting in was torn from its pedestal behind the driver panel and was now sitting in the front of the boat. Her seat was badly damaged. You could see where something had hit the back of the chair and torn a large hole in it. As well, the contour of the chair was pushed forward and you could tell it had been hit hard.
I guess mom was asking the wardens some questions and she must have snapped. I was on the other side of the area we were in from her when I heard this awful screaming. I knew it was her. She was wailing uncontrollably and it was loud. From what I understand, she damned God for real. This made Phil uncomfortable and he went and sat in the car. I took more pictures. While I was on the port side, I caught part of a conversation between Pepper and one of the wardens. There was a blue flannel button down oxford style shirt on the floor of the boat. Pepper picked it up and it was in pretty bad shape. While Pepper removed his water logged cigarettes from the shirt pocket, the warden asked to look at it. Pepper offered it up. The warden was in the process of spreading it out carefully and he asked Pepper if this was the shirt he was wearing at the moment of impact. Pepper responded that it was. Since I was standing there, I continued to listen. Once the warden had the shirt spread out, you could see a pattern of white flecks. The warden could tell immediately that the flecks were fiberglass and had to have been from the other boat. Once the warden made that comment, I could easily see what he was looking at. You could tell by the marks almost exactly how the boat hit Pepper. It was amazing. The warden asked Pepper if he could keep the shirt as evidence. Pepper again obliged. I followed the warden to his truck where he bagged the shirt and wrote something on it and sealed it. I remember thinking to myself what a waste of time. How on earth is this going to help. I almost thought it was the wardens way of putting on a little show for us so we would think they were doing something. As we came to find out much later, that shirt was very valuable to the investigation. Again, I was wrong. By now, people were hugging and consoling each other. Mom had regained some composure. The thought crossed my mind that maybe we should not have come. Looking back, we had to do it. It made it real for mom for sure. Big Jerry was shooting some pictures and perhaps even some video. I noticed a group of wardens standing off to the side in a small huddle. I thought they were just shooting the breeze while we looked at the boat like at a museum. Then I noticed that on of the wardens had his hand on one of the other wardens shoulder. The other warden had his head down and I could tell he was crying. Man, I instantly realized that I had these guys all wrong. This warden was upset and the pressure had apparently gotten to him. What a profound moment for me personally. Suddenly, I felt more secure in the situation and not quite so alone. Alone in a sense that the authorities were essentially handing us a boat and telling us Laura was dead. Thanks for coming to Marble Falls, drive safe. That was not it anymore. The warden himself had succumb to the emotion and it was a good sign. They were deeply concerned. Another small instance occurred at the boat as well. The girlfriend of Pepper, whose name I never got, was standing on the driver side of the boat near the initial impact. Pepper's girlfriend did not go out on the boat that night because she did not feel well. As she stood there with Pepper, I overheard her tell him that if she had been with them that night, she surely would have been sitting in the bow of the boat on the port side. At that moment I could see it in her face. She knew that her decision to stay behind probably save her life. She panicked with emotion suddenly and started crying. I turned and walked off. After a few more minutes, the wardens were back to asking Pepper and Justin more questions. By then we had all gathered around. I listened in. The wardens were encouraging the boys to stay behind and talk to the media about the missing boat. The idea being that the public responds better to pleas from family as it makes it more personal. Both boys declined. I believe the declination came from the feeling that if we went on TV it would cheapen our situation. The media has such a bad wrap these days from exploiting situations like this, I am sure they were timid. I stepped in and asked if they were not going to make the statement, who would. Suddenly Pepper's mom is asking me if I want the boys to make it, or if I want to make it and so on. I simply looked at the warden again and he responded that he would make the statement on our behalf, but it would lack the impact. Since the media was on the way, we all loaded up and left the impound. Plans had been made for us all to go out to the point. I didn't really want to go, but it wasn't something I was dreading. I didn't mind going to the point. I preferred to go with just my family members. Not a crowd. This time we had a crowd. When we left the impound it had to have been around 1:30pm. By the time our family arrived at the point it had to have been around 2pm or so. Everyone else was already there. They were waiting on us to show up. I didn't realize what the purpose of the visit to the point was yet. I thought we were all just simply going out there. Not the case. The wreath was the reason we were all there. They had made a wreath that we were going to float out into the water. Each of us were handed a single long stem rose. We all got into a circle and held hands and I believe Justin's dad, Al, offered up a word of prayer. The wreath was placed in the water and ceremoniously each person went to the edge of the water and threw their rose in. One at a time people went to the edge, stood there in a moment of silence and tossed their rose in as if to say good-bye. There in lies the problem. That is what brought me to my next bit of frustration with the whole situation. I know the group meant well. They are not a malicious group. It was just an ill-timed somewhat forced ritual. Almost of the feeling like, this is what happens on TV and in the movies. The problem was, Laura had not been gone more than 36 hours or so. We didn't have a body. We didn't have all the details. We hadn't even begun to discuss funeral plans or anything. And here we were having this ceremony to say good-bye. I was frustrated because it was not time for that. I am not sure what it meant to the others, but I was not alone with that feeling. Everyone went to the edge and wept, some kissed their rose and gently tossed them in. I couldn't bring myself to do it. I wanted to cry, I may have. I was crying for the fact that I was not ready to say good-bye. Unfortunately, crying in that situation was going to bring some unwanted consolation from strangers. Something I was despising at the time. Finally everyone except myself, Audrey and Phillip had tossed their roses in. Without saying a word to Phil about the situation and my feelings, I watched him walk to the edge and without hesitation he angrily threw his rose in the water and turned his back on it. I knew we were on the same page. Finally after a long time, Audrey and I did the same. We all stood around in silence in various places on the point. Some by themselves, some in pairs. Eventually, the rest of the group decided to leave our family alone there. Phillip had wandered out to the lighthouse again. It was about 150 yards away from where we had assembled. Dad wasn't there the previous day to see Phil spend time there himself. For that reason, dad was real concerned for Phil. I had to explain to him what he was doing and we need not step inside that boundary. Nevertheless, dad stood watch over him for a while. Mom and Robin went back to the car. After about another half hour, dad suggested that I take the girls back and he would stay there watching Phil. I could then return for them later. I didn't think it was a good idea. I knew Phil was where he wanted to be. Without offending dad, I had to convince him to leave Phil alone. He did and we waited a little longer. Unbeknownst to us, a local TV station arrived and was getting ready to run some footage from the point for a story they were doing that night. Mom misconstrued the presence of the media as being there to hound us for information. She yelled to them to leave us alone. The reporter advised she and Robyn that she was there to simply film a piece with the wardens and wasn't even aware that we were there. Robin came back and told me what happened. She said the reporter would like a statement from the family if possible. She wanted us to make a plea to the public for the driver of the other boat. Dad turned to me and told me to go do it. I went back down to the entrance of the point and introduced myself to the reporter. They wired me and within minutes we were filming. I thanked the wardens for their support and basically asked someone to come forward with information regarding the boat that hit and killed my sister. We were done in less than 5 minutes. By then, Phil was on his way back and we were all geared up to head back to the lake house. In the mean time, one of the other wardens came over to thank us for making a public plea. He implied that it was very helpful to their investigation to have a family member do it. Mom began asking him questions I knew he could not answer. Eventually I interjected the conversation and thanked him for his help and pointed out the reporter was ready for him. I think he knew what I was doing and he was relieved for the assist. I love my mother do death, but she was so mind scrambled by the ordeal, she just didn't realize the core mechanics of the situation. She just wanted answers to questions that were not ready to be answered. At that point, she probably expected to get her daughter back if she fought hard enough. It was sad to see her like that. She was understandably out of her mind. We loaded back up in the car and went back to the lake house. We had to drop off mom and dad. Phil and I were so on the same page it wasn't funny. We quickly came up with a reason to leave and go back to the hotel. The second day had been as bad if not worse than the first. We were ready for a shower and a few hours at Chili's. The day was about to get a little better for us. I will tell you this, the stomach pain was still there in full force. It was sick.
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